You're not alone

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Good Weekend

In regards to food anyway. Today I've had a piece of bread. I feel fine too. I don't know if I'll eat anymore when I get off work. I just feel like food is a chore. I don't enjoy it. I don't crave it. If I feel like I need the energy I'll eat some. And its a waste of any money I do have. This is kind of my routine for food.

Wake up. Drink coffee.
On my way to work I stop at the store
Buy a piece of bread(or sometimes the nice man gives it to me for free)
If it isn't bread its, an apple, a protein bar
Drink coffee.
Maybe eat if J wants me to
My mom gave my sister money for dinner the other night. Its not like I'd over eaten that day. Or that I'd even consider what we ate a 'binge'. But I did have more gluten than normal, and a bit of ice cream. I, sadly to say, purged. I just didn't want it in my system. I knew I would feel like crud the next day. Purging doesn't make me beautiful. I'm working hard to stop it. I'm happy to say that I haven't binged for a long time. I've stuffed my face with carrots, making me feel full, but not sick.
Next week I'm going to be going back to the gym. My ankle was pretty swollen yesterday from standing on it all day, driving around and such. I'm just going to be doing some lifting and ab work, maybe try a bit of cardio, but I'll be careful.
I feel so weird lately. I want to be close to J, but I don't at the same time. I feel so insecure. I don't like it when he touches me too much. I know he thinks I'm cute and I know he is attracted to me, but I can't help feeling the way I do.
Anyway I'll comment on your blogs later tonight!! Stay strong!!


obsessionperfection said...

heyy thats soo good that you dont crave food! and i am getting to that point too. which is great.=]

i am sorry about J. . . i wish i had words of wisdom for you,, but sadly i dont. i guess do whatever you feel. =]

you are doing soo good ---> down 10 pounds so far! and nine more to lose!!

oh so proud!

obsessionperfection said...

yeah i know what you mean... its hard. very hard. but this is soo difficult for me, i have to believe in SOMETHING.

you know?

but we are here for eachother=]

think thinn!

obsessionperfection said...

again i know what you are saying..

i dont want to be preachy so i wont lol

and well of course!!=]

obsessionperfection said...

I am actually a seventh day adventist.. we belive in the bible. and we believe in everything christians believe you know, but we go to church on saturdays. and some other beliefs are diff. but yeah. =]

what abuot you?

obsessionperfection said...

OH MY GOODNESSS!! doo i know what you mean!!

i hateee fake ppl. i agree with you soo much. they are like hypocrites right?!?! uggh soo annoying! i honestly think the same as you. i dont even enjoy going to church sadly because of the judmental ness lol

*Princess*Smile* said...

nah I am going to wait until the morn to weigh. & i havent found it yet, but i am hoping it will be in the cark-park of the pub, or my mum is going to be pissed! haha

*Princess*Smile* said...

:) thanks hun! I love reading your blog too! x

obsessionperfection said...


and yeah its deff. not yours only

and i weigh a huge 137... and i am 5'7

obsessionperfection said...

acutally i am quite muscualr.. my legs and what not .. i am in cheer so i cant be whimpy lol

Steph said...

Thanks for the comment, thanks for caring.
And I have no clue if we're talking about the same thing, but my ex was super touchy and it would make me so upset, and I never really knew why cause I liked him, it was just kind of an invasion of me and that bothered me. But I suggest if you two are close just talking to him?