You're not alone
Monday, November 30, 2009
I weighed myself and really felt happy with the results! I have to keep pushing it though. I won't give up. I can fit into my skinnies but I still see all the fat that needs to go bye bye. I feel more productive with myself lately and it makes a huge difference with my overall outlook. I decided to try and get more religious again. I have a new attitude and I really think I'll be able to stick with it. I love God and I love the beliefs I hold, and its nice to be surrounded by people who share the same beliefs. J and I are alright. I told him I wanted more space, not sleeping over anymore, but in the long run its for the best. My best friend will be coming home in 9 days and I still love him. I cried today after we chatted on email. I think its because today was my last chance to talk to him before I get to see him face to face. I haven't seen him in two years. Freak. I'm anxious, restless, but happy. I'm just trying to take everything one day at a time.
thin forver!!! So glad you're back. I'll post more tomorrow and try to comment on your blogs.
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
10:00 arrived at work. Nothing to do so I just checked my email, found out my best friend will be coming home from africa in two weeks and two days! I emailed my Mom about how depressed I have been feeling.
10:30 ignored a call from my old salon manager.
11:00 called back my old boss. Yesterday(sunday) I went into the salon to retrieve my blow dryer and straightener to do my sisters hair. Well when my I got on the phone with her she freaked out. "that was breaking and entering, that was trespassing, some of my stuff is missing, now i have to pay for new locks and i want you to pay for them". My boss has a very strong personality, very strong. I agreed to pay for the locks and then I bawled to J about how I didn't have money to pay for them, how I was afraid she might sue me. I talked to my Mom who said there was no way she would win a case if she did sue me and I shouldn't have to pay for the locks.
12:00 I wrote her a letter. Apologizing for upsetting her, explaining that my emotional issues were part of the reason for my less than professional choices, blah blah blah. I calmed down.
1:30 She called me back to tell me the amount it would cost to change the locks. I told her I couldn't afford to pay for it all and she said the only other option was to go through the police. One reason was because the building owners were wanting her to change the locks. But I told her if that was going to be the case I'd rather just go through the police.
2:30 I get to my own salon and there is a police officer there as well. He questions me "Did you take anything that didn't belong to you? Why did you come when anyone else wasn't here" My answer "I have no ill feelings and no reason to steal, I came at that time of day becuase my sister wanted me to do her hair last minute and I was in the area" I filed a police report, I gave her my nice letter. She seemed a little more chilled
I missed a swim meet because of the whole police and salon drama, i let him search my car and blah blah blah fuck fuck fuck shit shit shit.
My Dad called me while I was at the salon "No one messes with my little girl" So i feel confident if they do press charges that my Dad and his lawyer will kick ass.
5:00 got drunk until now. Holy shit this has been a dramatic day. Dramatic. Its bullshit. I didn't steal anything from her, and I can't believe she attacked me like that. It just makes me hate myself when I shouldn't.
So hopefully I don't have to have more drama with the court.
My raw food diet didn't start today, but my intake was low so tomorrow is a new day. I'm still drunk. I love you ladies and gents(if any?) stay strong!
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Friday, November 20, 2009
I've been doing really well. Sorry I haven't been blogging. Its just that I have nothing to talk about. This whole week I've been mostly non productive. Ha ha. I do have one funny story:
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Friday, November 13, 2009
For some reason I really love this picture. So creepy/beautiful. Maybe creepy isn't the right word. Mysterious Yes I like it.
So I've been feeling a lot better about life. I've been given new responsibilites at work and I actually feel like an important person as far as the work place goes. I'm valuable in that aspect eh? Feels nice. Especially since jobs can be somewhat foreboding, dulling, brain numbing, mind killing, life sucking and what not. He he. Okay i'm done. But yeah I'm enjoying work.
Coaching has been a blast this year! We have a meet today actually, I have to leave pretty soon. I'm so proud of my swimmers. They are all(most of them anywya) working their butts off! I'm excited to see how they'll do.
Lastly: My band is playing at a battle of the bands tonight!!!! I hope we win. If we win tonight we get to compete in the finals tomorrow. I'm excited!! Fingers crossed.
Stay strong everyone!!! Weekends can sometimes be hard, but keep motivated and focused!!