You're not alone

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

The truth

Have you ever heard people say when you're drunk or high you are really honest? Yeah that happens. I'm surprised I haven't flat out told my boyfriend about my ED. Last night I was basically in tears when he started to kiss me. In my head I was thinking how disgusting it must be to kiss me. This was so stupid, but what started it was "looks like your make up has run a bit'. I tried to fix it, but he said to stop, it didn't matter. I was on the verge of tears when I asked him to make me look good. He was holding my arms back and not letting me wipe my make up. He was trying to get the point across that he didn't care, but holy hell. Being stoned makes me freak out.

This is a stupid blog. I'm sorry. Yesterday was a complete failure, other than me passing my test. I'll write a better post tomorrow

Cals today: 560. gross


MyNameIsMellon said...

Your boyfriend is really really sweet. You guys are lucky to have each other. And the next time you freak, just think to yourself "this amazing person thinks that I am special enough to be with, so I must be doing something right, right?"

SkinnyBitch said...

Awh, it's okay. Your boyfriend sounds so awesome. I know he may not make you feel the best sometimes, because my boyfriend is like that, but it sounds like he's understanding and really cares about you (but won't put up with bullshit either, haha!)

myObsession09 said...

i know what you mean. after any time my boyfriend and i are just together (even after a year) i worry about how my hair or makeup looks like and constantly check myself just in case. Im so terrified of something being disarranged and in his mind he might think ew, why am i with her? i could do so much better..
your gorgeous, he wouldnt have tried to pass the point across if he didnt mean it hun.