Not so Bad

Ok so last night I went to the open casting thing for a bikini calendar.  It wasn't what I expected.  In fact it was better than what I expected.  They are a new company and if they choose me as a model it would kind of be like an agency.  Yet, they are totally fine and encourage their models to work with anyone that wants to use us.  I don't hear back from them until today or tomorrow.  I don't know if I'm calendar material..but it would be amazing if they chose me.  

If not.  I'll live.  I have a few other shoots lined up for other photographers.  I have one tomorrow for some headshots.  On monday I'll be working with someone all day.  Then a few others.  This is so motivating for me.  I feel like I have more control.  I need to get back in shape.  I've already gone down in weight.  

Ha ha this might be tmi.. but yesterday I peed green.  I took some laxatives wednesday night to make sure anything in my stomach would be out. Then yesterday I was taking water pills to look as slim as I could for the casting.  I think maybe a mixture of both did something.  Ah well. 

My boyfriend got really down last night when I talked about me modeling.  I asked him if he would be jealous when I worked with male photographers.  He said yes.  I told him he didn't need to worry about it because it was all business.  He said "I think they are getting the better end of the deal"   Bleh.  I can understand where he is coming from, but I wish he would be more supportive.  Like "babe I'm really glad you are getting to work with some photographers.  You're doing what you want"  Instead its "oh other boys are going to photograph you."  Sigh.  I can't please anyone.