You're not alone

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Como cava

Below: At a Jesuit place. This is a Banana tree. Africa is dirty, don't judge!
I've been having a pretty good time. The anti-malaria pills have made me throw up twice now. I switched to one I used last year that should make me feel less yucky.

I love being away from everyone. My bf is making me so mad. He is drama right now. I'm trying to figure out this stupid ED, and why I feel the urge to restrict or fast. Two days ago he made me a little upset when I called him, I miss him! I got off the phone and knew I would fast the next day. I did fast most the day, but was feeling happier, and decided I was now punishing myself for acting in a selfish way. Then I ate a little.

Then felt guilty for eating, and was afraid of gaining wait. I purged for the first time in a while. It wasn't a b/p. I cried, wrote in my journal, discovered somethings. Ate dinner(asked both of my parents if this food would make me fat). Then went to bed

This trip has been really good though. I have noticed a lot of changed in just a little over a year. The streets are being cleaned up, I don't feel as threatened. Except, ha ha, some little boy did try and still a plastic bag I was carrying with some extra fabric in it. I'm having a congolese dressed made for me. I've been taking loads of pictures with my new camera! I'll post more when I have better internet. I want to steal this one boy, Mishaek! He is so adorable and I hope I get to see him tomorrow :). I remember him from last year, but he wasn't around when I visited the village he lives in.
I want to go running, and I think I'll be able to do that once we return to "the bush" and get out of the city. Stay lovely everyone!


Peridot (G+P) said...

I'm loving your sarong! It's so bright and pretty!

I hope you continue to have a blast and get head-crap sorted out. <3


Lyndee said...

Good luck girly i'm glad your really trying to help your head clear your amazing and im totally here for you!

your pic is beautiful by the way!!!

stay strong!
xoxo Lyndee

Emry said...

Sounds like a lovely time! Nice pic! Hope you have fun there!

Twigs Can Fly said...

I think you look beautiful miss, and eating food will make you even more so.

You're fantastic, and I hope you're having fun in Africa (:

Do you go often?

lifelovelive said...
This comment has been removed by the author. said...

looks awesome, have a great time! x

Matilda Bonnet said...

I'm glad you are having fun! Try not to think about food or anything while you're there! Just enjoy!
ps. you look beautiful! :)