Saturday night I didn't want to spend time alone. I cut myself, just enough to feel, to try and get rid of the pain. After that I went to the gym, went tanning, and shopping. I was just trying to avoid being home alone. I decided to venture to a siblings place planning on having some fun. It was a non stop trip basically. I feel a lot better that I did decide to not be alone. I cleaned all day and fasted 18 hours! Something else that really helped...
The boy asked me to hang out tonight, which we did..for many hours.I quote him when I say 'how much sooner is sooner, than later?' I think when we hung out for the first time i said something like..hope to see you sooner than later. He stayed a lot longer than I even thought. We jammed, watched a movie and talked. Nothing romantic has happened yet. I was still pretty out of it. He is so beautiful, skinny, and shy. He complimented me on my skirt.. that made me happy. I don't really know a whole lot about this dating game.
I plan to continue my control and then maybe I can deserve him. I want to learn a new song on my guitar so next time we jam i can sing something new for him, maybe i'll write a new original song.