She invite me to her "shake" party.
Me: sorry that stuff is way to triggering for my eating disorder.
Two weeks later my other sister invites me.
I gave the same response.
I just am so triggered. I am already teetering on relapse mode. When I see the obsession and constant focus from them, it makes me want to puke. It also makes me think
why am I not trying to lose weight? I should be trying to lose weight. I should be only eating once a day and drinking shakes like they do
You get bet that I get the worst anxiety just thinking of what we would talk about if we got together " weight loss. Weight loss weight loss weight loss."
I love them. But I can't be around them right now. I just can't. I am happy they are achieving what they want. I truly am.
But I have to set boundaries. And I wish I didn't
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2 comments:
You gotta focus on you. They love you and I am sure they will understand. Do what's best for you!!!!
Good Luck,
Emily
Your health and sanity are so much much more fucking important than they can even guess.
If they can't even TRY to understand it, they can go fuck themselves.
Seriously, I would block updates from her if they're triggering you badly or start posting recovery/recovery struggle updates in retaliation.
Point out that for you this is quite literally a matter of life and death, and you joining in would be a race to see who gets NG-Tubed first -.- So not cool!
A ton of love to you <3
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